Kindling again
Apparently, women are reading erotica on their Kindles. This is, apparently, newsworthy. Newsworthy for a couple of reasons, firstly because it allows editors of tabloid newspapers to write about women reading erotica, and possibly use a saucy picture of a woman with a Kindle looking a bit flustered, and also because if the paper is owned by a group with a publishing arm, it allows them to plug a few of their filthier titles. Newsworthy also because any bloke reading it will be staggered that a woman can both own and operate a gadget, despite previously showing no aptitude for technology beyond the niche talent for bringing up the browsing history on your laptop, yet apparently still being incapable of fucking recording the footie when asked.
One wonders how this story ever surfaced at all, as one of the features of the Kindle is that nobody can tell what you are reading without looking at the screen. Possibly a Guardian journo was on a bus journey and noticed the woman next to him with a Kindle in one hand, furiously thrumming herself with the other, but more likely somebody checked out the on-line sales chart, wondered 'who the hell is reading this crap?', downloaded it and concluded 'women'.
This is a natural conclusion. Women read erotica and men read porn the same way that ladies glow and men perspire. If a bloke wants to read porn, he goes to the top shelf, not the book shelf. It has to be noted though that in recent years, the top shelf appears to have got rather prudish, with wrappers round the covers. This is despite the lower shelves awash with lads mags with covers featuring the sort of thing that requires artful captions to keep things even within stroking distance of decent.
So, people are reading things on their Kindle that, presumably, they would be embarrassed to read if it was in paperback form, although this has not stopped the publication of 'Fisty shades of shite' or whatever it's called now being published as a paperback, with a discreetly arty cover.
Possibly this is a reasonable fear. People do make judgements about other people based on what they are reading, in the same way that they make assumptions about them based on the contents of their shopping trolly (fifty cans of cat food and a microwave meal for one tells a sad story). In the past, it was a frequent occurrence on public transport to find somebody attractive right up until the point where they pulled out a copy of the Daily Mail and started reading with every sign of enjoyment. Now that everybody reads the Metro, you won't know that somebody is a Nazi until you start talking to them, although its a pretty safe assumption that if they are reading the Metro, they're an idiot. It's also a safe assumption that if you are English and on public transport, you won't be talking to anyone.
So the Kindle allows people to read books that they might otherwise think twice about reading in public. This applies not just to erotica, but for instance to far right literature. The bloke next to you could be smiling and nodding while he reads 'Mein Kamph' or whatever the hell it's called. Likewise, they could be reading the literature of the hard left, if Socialist Worker ever gets round to putting out a Kindle version.
And of course they could be reading children's books. This implies that there is some kind of shame in reading children's literature if you are a grown-up, a trend that was reinforced when Bloomsbury brought out editions of the Harry Potter books with different covers for adults. I didn't think there was any shame in reading the kids' edition, certainly not compared with the shame of paying an extra quid for the adult cover. I certainly know people who still have all their old Enid Blyton's and why shouldn't they while away a train journey reading about the famous five? Certainly better than reading the bloody Metro.
As for me, I shall stick with my 'Lads Book of Fun' from 1957, discreetly tucked inside a copy of 'Razzle'.
One wonders how this story ever surfaced at all, as one of the features of the Kindle is that nobody can tell what you are reading without looking at the screen. Possibly a Guardian journo was on a bus journey and noticed the woman next to him with a Kindle in one hand, furiously thrumming herself with the other, but more likely somebody checked out the on-line sales chart, wondered 'who the hell is reading this crap?', downloaded it and concluded 'women'.
This is a natural conclusion. Women read erotica and men read porn the same way that ladies glow and men perspire. If a bloke wants to read porn, he goes to the top shelf, not the book shelf. It has to be noted though that in recent years, the top shelf appears to have got rather prudish, with wrappers round the covers. This is despite the lower shelves awash with lads mags with covers featuring the sort of thing that requires artful captions to keep things even within stroking distance of decent.
So, people are reading things on their Kindle that, presumably, they would be embarrassed to read if it was in paperback form, although this has not stopped the publication of 'Fisty shades of shite' or whatever it's called now being published as a paperback, with a discreetly arty cover.
Possibly this is a reasonable fear. People do make judgements about other people based on what they are reading, in the same way that they make assumptions about them based on the contents of their shopping trolly (fifty cans of cat food and a microwave meal for one tells a sad story). In the past, it was a frequent occurrence on public transport to find somebody attractive right up until the point where they pulled out a copy of the Daily Mail and started reading with every sign of enjoyment. Now that everybody reads the Metro, you won't know that somebody is a Nazi until you start talking to them, although its a pretty safe assumption that if they are reading the Metro, they're an idiot. It's also a safe assumption that if you are English and on public transport, you won't be talking to anyone.
So the Kindle allows people to read books that they might otherwise think twice about reading in public. This applies not just to erotica, but for instance to far right literature. The bloke next to you could be smiling and nodding while he reads 'Mein Kamph' or whatever the hell it's called. Likewise, they could be reading the literature of the hard left, if Socialist Worker ever gets round to putting out a Kindle version.
And of course they could be reading children's books. This implies that there is some kind of shame in reading children's literature if you are a grown-up, a trend that was reinforced when Bloomsbury brought out editions of the Harry Potter books with different covers for adults. I didn't think there was any shame in reading the kids' edition, certainly not compared with the shame of paying an extra quid for the adult cover. I certainly know people who still have all their old Enid Blyton's and why shouldn't they while away a train journey reading about the famous five? Certainly better than reading the bloody Metro.
As for me, I shall stick with my 'Lads Book of Fun' from 1957, discreetly tucked inside a copy of 'Razzle'.
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