Nature Notes - The feast of St Jude

A perhaps unintended consequence of improvements to long term weather forecasting is that the ever-speculative rolling news is now able to report news stories before they have even happened. 

So it was that when the Met Office started talking about fronts, wind and amber warnings, the weather forecasters suddenly found themselves not just tacked on after the news, but popping up during it.  At last, a chance to sit at the big shiny desk, not just hover in front of a bloody big map of the UK wondering idly where Droitwich is.

As the isobars pushed closer together than the boobs of a bird in a wonder-bra, salivation television began.  Two days in advance of the savage storm, we were left in no doubt that you should not travel on the day of the storm, nor should you go out without an unsecured wig, and that if you have pets, you should staple them to the floor.  Anything up to a pony.  Essentially, unless you were down a mine the weekend of the storm, you could expect trouble.

Actually, the weather forecasters earned their money.  The storm arrived as scheduled, was pretty intense and some damage was done, with branches down and travel disruption (that old chestnut of leaves on the line, except this time they were still attached to the tree).  But people were prepared, that was the key, those that would not be able to travel into work were able to make sure they had panic-bought DVDs and Xbox games to keep themselves amused.

The big concern was the ‘storm surge’, as the wind drove the sea onshore.  So terrifying was this prospect that many immediately took to the sea front armed with their mobile to take what would be, by the look of some of those waves, their most exciting selfie ever and quite possibly the last one they would ever take on their non-waterproof ‘phone.

And of course the storm was reported ahead of time, in real time and in the aftermath.  Because it was concentrated in the south of England, it received blanket media coverage, with even the strongest hair care products being tested to the limits as BBC reporters got a bit blown about.  Personally, it’s the squirrels I feel sorry for.