Fat ugly litterbugs

ankers! That’s the sort of git that eats at McDs. Fat, ugly, bloated and sad, filling their faces with the bits of the cow that the supermarkets don’t want. In the drive through, their cars ride low. When they waddle to the counter you can hear the chaffing of their enormous thighs as they sweat their way up to the counter, oozing last nights grease and smacking their lips at the thought of getting another load of shit food down their necks before going home and listlessly watching reality telly with a glassy eyed stare normally associated with dead fish.

The good thing about the inability to run of the average McDs consumer is that when I fund the one that littered my front garden with their hash brown wrapper, they won’t be able to make a speedy getaway when I harpoon their enormous arse and cut them up for fucking dog-meat.

McDs really does manage to blot the landscape. Their premises are an eyesore that stink of processed chemicals and fat, their customers are truly trolls and now they are exporting their litter to me.

I did think for a while about posting it back to their head office. It’s genuinely worth the stamp to mail a discarded wrapper back to those bastards.

Then I hit upon the ultimate revenge - I dropped it in my recycle bin.

That’s right, I’m hitting back. This is one wrapper that’s not going to stay litter. It’s going to be recycled, bought by somebody and, I sincerely hope, used to print out environmental literature on.