Friday, April 18, 2008

This morning at the Krispy Kreme stand

Because I’m so regular in my habits it borders on autism, when I visit the Krispy Kreme stand for breakfast (coffee to jump-start the heart, lard to sooth the effects of the coffee) I always get the same order – an original glazed and a medium latte. They now know better than to try and tempt me with more stuff. This morning the woman in the queue in front was buying four doughnuts (and three coffees, so I presume it wasn’t all for her). This being the case, the smooth-tongued dougnuteer behind the counter was trying to convince her to buy a half-dozen as, even though you spent more, you got a better deal per doughnut. This is an argument that regularly results in people leaving the stand with a double dozen, one coffee and a bemused expression.

The chap behind the counter was explaining that ‘I am only trying to save you pounds’, the woman retorted ‘and I’m trying to save these pounds’, patting a flat stomach. I thought that sort of pun wasn’t bad for that time of the morning. I wonder if the woman, petit, blonde and with immaculate make-up, was taking the doughnutty goodness to the nearby stall serving the unlikely purpose of promoting ‘The Sun’ crossword by having page three girls there to help you with the clues.

What does a page three girl look like with her clothes on? Well, pretty much like any other young woman actually, except for their hair – I’ve never seen hair like it on a human being, so…big. I think it’s the result of having your hair professionally done every day.

What the girls are going to look like at the end of the day is anyone’s guess. They were wrapped in sweatshirts and puffa jeckets trying to keep warm and, of course, you can’t smoke in the station. Denied this usual mode of model sustenance, I wonder how many trips to the KK stall will be made today. Who knows, the result could be that, at last, some real sized women finally make it into the world of glamour modelling.

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