Going green
I am by no means a deep green environmentalist. I’m happy to fly and I love love love all my gadgets with their lithium ion batteries. But Jesus Christ! Sometimes you just have to take a breath and think that we’re about half an hour away from the collapse of civilization as it falls under the sheer weight of all the useless, pointless garbage we produce and apparently sell to people who don’t need it.
Air freshener. Who buys air freshener? I’ll tell you who - common people. That’s right, common people with middle class pretentious. There was an advert last night for some sort of spray thing that makes the room smell lovely. Or, and here’s just a suggestion - how about buying a bunch of flowers every week? Then you can compost them, or eat them.
But the capper on the crapper was this mini sir freshener thing you fir in your loo so that, presumably after you have rendered it about as pleasant as a leper hospital in Kabul, you press. This no doubt drowns out whatever vileness you have just created with bouquet of synthetic stench.
Or…open a window! Has the world gone fucking mad? What do people THINK they are going to experience when they enter a loo? If you want to have the scent of lavender while answering the call of nature, go poo in the forest. Otherwise, open a window or get some flowers or change your diet.
Who wants their house to smell like a Parisian knocking-shop? Give me the lingering aroma of bacon and the small of the damp grass coming from the back garden any day.
Air freshener. Who buys air freshener? I’ll tell you who - common people. That’s right, common people with middle class pretentious. There was an advert last night for some sort of spray thing that makes the room smell lovely. Or, and here’s just a suggestion - how about buying a bunch of flowers every week? Then you can compost them, or eat them.
But the capper on the crapper was this mini sir freshener thing you fir in your loo so that, presumably after you have rendered it about as pleasant as a leper hospital in Kabul, you press. This no doubt drowns out whatever vileness you have just created with bouquet of synthetic stench.
Or…open a window! Has the world gone fucking mad? What do people THINK they are going to experience when they enter a loo? If you want to have the scent of lavender while answering the call of nature, go poo in the forest. Otherwise, open a window or get some flowers or change your diet.
Who wants their house to smell like a Parisian knocking-shop? Give me the lingering aroma of bacon and the small of the damp grass coming from the back garden any day.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home