Is this the way to Amarillo?
The resident ethnic minority in the office (Welshman) has declared his intention of getting a ‘Tom-Tom’ sat-nav for his next driving holiday down to the South of France with his family. We have suggested that he spend his money instead on ear-plugs or ‘plane tickets, but he’s adamant.
I was recently in Halfords, buying some engine coolant and wondering if I should pimp my ride with under-car lighting, spinny things on the wheels and possibly a Garfield for the back window when I wandered over to the sat-nav section.
I remain unimpressed. No machine is going to tell me which way to turn. I don’t take directions off strangers or women so I’m sure as hell not going to take it off a box. This is how the Terminator got started.
For the money, you’re far better off buying a shitload of maps. The Welshman contested that Ordinance Survey did not map France. This, I argued, was surely a point in favour of going down the map route. Not only would you have an excuse to holiday in Britain, but you could actually find out what some of the map symbols mean by visiting them. My tip - start with ‘PH’.
One of the drawbacks of the things is that they are hypnotic. In a cab last night the driver had one stuck to his window and I was watching it instead of the road. To a generation of video-game players used to keeping one eye on the action on the screen and one eye on the environment-map usually in the left hand corner, the temptation will be to concentrate on the map, using it to navigate. The problem is that while it is great at picking up corners, it’s less great at picking up parked cars and so on – and let’s face it, it’s only a mater of time before the first Tom-Tom virus is out there and you are idly toodling along some road when the display shows hoards of attacking orcs descending on your car.
I was recently in Halfords, buying some engine coolant and wondering if I should pimp my ride with under-car lighting, spinny things on the wheels and possibly a Garfield for the back window when I wandered over to the sat-nav section.
I remain unimpressed. No machine is going to tell me which way to turn. I don’t take directions off strangers or women so I’m sure as hell not going to take it off a box. This is how the Terminator got started.
For the money, you’re far better off buying a shitload of maps. The Welshman contested that Ordinance Survey did not map France. This, I argued, was surely a point in favour of going down the map route. Not only would you have an excuse to holiday in Britain, but you could actually find out what some of the map symbols mean by visiting them. My tip - start with ‘PH’.
One of the drawbacks of the things is that they are hypnotic. In a cab last night the driver had one stuck to his window and I was watching it instead of the road. To a generation of video-game players used to keeping one eye on the action on the screen and one eye on the environment-map usually in the left hand corner, the temptation will be to concentrate on the map, using it to navigate. The problem is that while it is great at picking up corners, it’s less great at picking up parked cars and so on – and let’s face it, it’s only a mater of time before the first Tom-Tom virus is out there and you are idly toodling along some road when the display shows hoards of attacking orcs descending on your car.
1 Comments:
I'm I the only one on the planet who has been freaked out ever since I read the book, 1984?? I think I've been paranoid ever since. Even when I got my driver's license at the age of 16, I practiced making sure no one was following me (does that make me crazy?) and then being able to lose someone who was (we actually used to race on the way home from school so it came in handy).
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