RHS Hampton Court 2007 - the cocktail!
There’s no doubt that all the gardens, show and otherwise, at the RHS show at Hampton Court were immaculate. Some were spectacular, some beautiful, some more than others. And some had bars!
"Waiters start to worry what will happen when the booze runs out."
There’s a lot you can do with a smallish plot, and one of the common themes this year appeared to be sticking a bar in the corner of it and giving away booze in the hope of a) securing the ‘people’s choice’ prize through outright bribery or b) getting one of the increasingly schloshed crowd to sign up to buying a crate of whatever it was you were giving away in thimble-full glasses.
From a drinking point of view – the day went well, starting at the Gran-marnier garden with the established tactic of ‘one for me, one for my friend’, then on through sherry, onto Australian reds, whites and sparkling before a soft landing at the excellent Torres garden and some robust Spanish red.
"Olives are delicious...obviously somebody must come up with some way of making alcohol from them!"
Remarking to a couple of welly-sporting women in front of me at the booze queue at one of the gardens ‘I believe there are plants here too’, they fixed me with a look and replied ‘really? We only come for the clothes.’. Obviously they are refugees from the Country Living tent.
There was a lot that was remarkable about this year’s show. I loved the many ‘drought resistant’ gardens, especially those being pumped out given the constant rain in the last months. I loved the ‘conservative values’ garden, the Oak, the bedding plants shaped like a British fields, the tree that doubles as a lynching post for asylum seekers and the secueters that can be used to castrate crims – but best of all the thick hedges for upper class tories to have sex with call-girls behind.
"Ah, a grove of metal trees...what was in that last gin?"
The day ended very well at the Country Living tent with the purchase of sausages and organic Gin. Not only was this gin good for me, it was good for the environment and the economy of the organic world, I was helping pandas and polar bears by buying gin….or something. One thing is for sure, the guy on the stall made the greatest small gin and tonics – the sample glasses are lilliputan and are normally filled with neat gin (they are the size of a shot glass). I insisted he make me a gin and tonic and I could see that he was glad that he’s had the request, as he profusely apologised for having no lime. I cursed him for a barbarian and drank my gin.
When one tired of helping penguins, one could redress the balance and visit the British Airways stall. Here were two club class seats and, judging by the number of people having their photograph taken in them, reclining with their bottles of gin (or was that just me?), I think BA profits are set to rise, even if, because of security scares, their aeroplanes do not.
"This year's Gold Medal for fricking creepy stall...stone children! Aggghhhhhh, Aggghhhh! Stone children! Children that have been petrified by the witch at the end of the village! No? Just me? Well, the stall owner looked like some sort of ciramic peado!"
"Waiters start to worry what will happen when the booze runs out."There’s a lot you can do with a smallish plot, and one of the common themes this year appeared to be sticking a bar in the corner of it and giving away booze in the hope of a) securing the ‘people’s choice’ prize through outright bribery or b) getting one of the increasingly schloshed crowd to sign up to buying a crate of whatever it was you were giving away in thimble-full glasses.
From a drinking point of view – the day went well, starting at the Gran-marnier garden with the established tactic of ‘one for me, one for my friend’, then on through sherry, onto Australian reds, whites and sparkling before a soft landing at the excellent Torres garden and some robust Spanish red.
"Olives are delicious...obviously somebody must come up with some way of making alcohol from them!"Remarking to a couple of welly-sporting women in front of me at the booze queue at one of the gardens ‘I believe there are plants here too’, they fixed me with a look and replied ‘really? We only come for the clothes.’. Obviously they are refugees from the Country Living tent.
There was a lot that was remarkable about this year’s show. I loved the many ‘drought resistant’ gardens, especially those being pumped out given the constant rain in the last months. I loved the ‘conservative values’ garden, the Oak, the bedding plants shaped like a British fields, the tree that doubles as a lynching post for asylum seekers and the secueters that can be used to castrate crims – but best of all the thick hedges for upper class tories to have sex with call-girls behind.
"Ah, a grove of metal trees...what was in that last gin?"The day ended very well at the Country Living tent with the purchase of sausages and organic Gin. Not only was this gin good for me, it was good for the environment and the economy of the organic world, I was helping pandas and polar bears by buying gin….or something. One thing is for sure, the guy on the stall made the greatest small gin and tonics – the sample glasses are lilliputan and are normally filled with neat gin (they are the size of a shot glass). I insisted he make me a gin and tonic and I could see that he was glad that he’s had the request, as he profusely apologised for having no lime. I cursed him for a barbarian and drank my gin.
When one tired of helping penguins, one could redress the balance and visit the British Airways stall. Here were two club class seats and, judging by the number of people having their photograph taken in them, reclining with their bottles of gin (or was that just me?), I think BA profits are set to rise, even if, because of security scares, their aeroplanes do not.
"This year's Gold Medal for fricking creepy stall...stone children! Aggghhhhhh, Aggghhhh! Stone children! Children that have been petrified by the witch at the end of the village! No? Just me? Well, the stall owner looked like some sort of ciramic peado!"
Labels: BA, Drink, Flowers, Gardens, Gin, Hampton Court, RHS, Royal Horticultural Society, Show
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